Man Is Arrested For Getting It On With A Teddy Bear … FOR THE 4TH TIME!
A Ohio man was arrested for public masturbation, after police caught him having his way with a teddy bear. This incident will mark the fourth time the man has been arrested doing that exact same thing!
28 year old, Charles Marshall, was spotted by health clinic employees having his way with a stuffed bear (I regret my poor choice of words there). He was arrested for disorderly conduct by the officers, who I imagine played 'Rock Papers Scissors' on who would take the call.
Marshall has been busted before, FOUR TIMES, for using the bear to pleasure himself in public. Each time he has received a short sentence and a small fine. Unfortunately getting it on with a stuffed bear in public is only considered a misdemeanor in this country.
He has been banned from all county libraries, because his first act of beast-toy-ality was committed in one. Well one thing is for certain, those fabric softener commercials are going to start grossing me out.