Machine Gun Kelly Seeking Therapy to Reconcile Drug Abuse

Machine Gun Kelly is taking steps in his personal life to reconcile his past drug abuse as he shifts his focus away from substance dependence to fuel creativity and gets back in touch with his day-to-day identity as Colson Baker. The rapper turned pop-punk musician also revealed he has recently engaged in his first therapy session to aid his progress.

In a conversation with actor and director Dave Franco for Interview Magazine, MGK explained his artistic transformation with his chart-topping new record, Tickets To My Downfall. He outlined the differences between being a rapper, a pop-punk musician, actor and, most recently, a director as well as he oversaw the production of the forthcoming Downfalls High musical, based off the 2020 album.

Speaking specifically about his relationship with drugs and creativity, Machine Gun Kelly told Franco, "I think I watched myself believe that drugs were how you attained a level, or unlocked something in your brain, and I’ve seen the pros and cons of it. Adderall was a huge thing for me for a long time. And I went from orally taking it to then snorting it, and then it became something where I was scared to ever go into a studio if I didn’t have something."

Further detailing his dependence, he continued, "I wouldn’t even step out unless there was a medicine man who was going to visit me and give me what I needed. And that’s where it becomes a problem. You’re telling yourself you can’t do this without that, when really it’s in you the whole time. If that pill did that for you, then everyone who’s taken that would just be making albums and writing songs. And so that limited me."

Understanding of personal growth, he also acknowledged, "That same person who I was when I was 25 isn't who I am now" and "Currently, my drug of choice is happiness and commitment to the art, rather than commitment to a vice that I believed made the art."

In an effort to make continuous progress, MGK also sought the help of therapy sessions for the first time. "I had my first therapy session last Thursday [edit: it is not known exactly what date the interview was conducted in regards to which date this Thursday fell on]. That's the first time I ever went, 'Hey, I need to separate these two people,' which is Machine Gun Kelly and Colson Baker. The dichotomy is too intense for me."

Still, change has not been instantaneous.

"I’m early in the process [of going to therapy]. The tools that I’ve been given to start with seem helpful, I think. I’m still kind of ripping my hair out. Why am I not changing overnight? How am I supposed to meditate for 10 minutes when I can’t even sit in my own brain for two minutes without distracting myself by doing something? That’s really hard," MGK confessed.

He did note that he's inspired by the commitment to change and feels it will have a ripple effect in life as his family and others feel the energy of the change surrounding him.

Blink-182's Travis Barker, who produced Tickets To My Downfall, has also served as an influential mentor for the 30-year-old musician, having gone through similar experiences.

Opening up about that mentor role Barker has played, MGK added, "It’s much different than a priest or something, where I’m like, 'How can you relate to me? It’s easy for you to tell me I can get through it when you’ve never faced these obstacles.' Whereas with Travis it’s like, 'I know for a fact that you went through what I’m going through.'

His girlfriend, actress Megan Fox, has played a beneficial role as well.

"And then obviously, which I’m sure is the same with you in your relationship, when you have a partner, mine being Megan, sitting there with you on those dark nights when you’re sweating and not being able to figure out why you’re so in your head, to help you get out of your head and put it in perspective, that really, really helps," he urged.

To read the complete interview, head here.

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