How to Avoid 2012

It's the end of the world! What are you going to do? Just pull out your handy-dandy Time Machine.

What do you mean 'your Time Machine is busted'? Well, if it's anything like my grandma's old bunny-eared TV set all you have to do is smack it a few times and it should be fine. I mean, what could possibly go wrong, right? ...right?