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Alana: The Most Cringeworthy Toddlers And Tiara’s Contestant


In my personal opinion, most of the parents on TLC’s Toddlers and Tiaras should be locked up for borderline child abuse. And after receiving this clip from a friend, I stand by that opinion. 

Meet Alana, she is the daughter of a self described ‘Coupon Queen’. Her dad also appears in the episode, but its apparent that man gave up on living many years ago. It should also be noted that he and Alana need subtitles so you can understand what in the heck they are saying.

This episode will either make you laugh, make you cry, or make you wonder if there actually is a god. Alana, who is six (which pushes that ‘toddler’ title a little), proclaims that a ‘dollar will make her holler’. That should set her up perfectly as part of the morning crew of a strip club, in about 12-13 years.

Things only get better as you see this kid chugging Mountain Dew, which she calls her ‘go-go juice’, and showing her chubby stomach to the camera. Is the ‘coupon queen’ preparing her for a future appearance on 16 And Pregnant. Or will she become one of the ‘People of Walmart’?

Only time will tell. For now enjoy the clip from VH1’s Best Week Ever.

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